Blink

Blink
by Malcolm Gladwell

This is an interesting book about the subconscious. We process by association. We deny our biases but reaction times and association tests prove faster reactions by race or gender to positive and negative values that embarrass us. But its there. The locked door. The subconscious.

Positive experiences change our subconscious reactions to race, gender, personalities, religions. When we want to open ourselves to them it can become easier.

Psychoanalysis allows us to verbalize experiences in detail and understand consciously experiences such as taste, emotional reaction, relationships, and it frees the subconscious from delayed expression in often unhealthy ways. Psychoanalysis is training the mind to process an experience at the conscious level, uncovering those unconscious reactions -- and freeing one from their possibly unwanted anxiety.

The face is tied to emotional centers in the brain, and the brain is tied to action units of the face that can create emotion. These are possibly an untapped resource in training mood, behavior relationships. In fact, one can detect lying, false motives, hidden contempt, doomed relationships, peaceful or aggressive behavior patterns in group pictures, and understand who one is dealing with quickly from the study of their facial micromovements on film or with practice in life.

Some resources on this study of facial expressions, emotions, and 'mind-reading' see Paul Ekman and Wallace Friesen, "Facial Action Coding System Part 1 and 2", UCSF 1978. Dave Grossman's wonderful book, "The Bulletproof Mind: Prevailing in violent encounters . . . and After".

Machiavelli

Why Machiavelli Matters

by Ian Demack

How would you respond if Cesare Borgia invited you to dinner?

Cesare Borgia was the bad boy of the Renaissance. The illegitimate son of Pope Alexander VI, he ravaged northern Italy, seizing towns and murdering those who stood in his way. Not even his allies were safe. A dinner invitation could be your death sentence. He stabbed, strangled and poisoned with impunity.

Cesare Borgia died in 1507, so he won't be inviting you to dinner. But his spirit lives on. We will all, at some point in our lives, meet our very own Cesare Borgia.

He--or she--may not be obvious at first. A new manager, a work colleague, a community leader, maybe even a priest--it doesn't matter which disguise he wears. Before you meet your Cesare Borgia, you had best be prepared.

Who better to advise you than someone who met the original and lived to tell the tale? As a Florentine diplomat, Niccolò Machiavelli spent four months in Borgia's court. The behavior he observed there inspired The Prince.

At first glance, The Prince may seem irrelevant to our lives today. After all, the book is almost 500 years old! But the abuse of power is not peculiar to Renaissance politics. It can occur at any time, in any workplace, in any relationship. The principles Machiavelli discovered apply equally to our lives today.

In popular culture, Machiavelli is synonymous with deceit and treachery. However, Machiavelli's main concerns were the security of the state and the welfare of its people. Much of his leadership advice is plain common sense. In Chapter 21 of The Prince, he explains what leaders must do to be esteemed. Presidents who attend the Olympics and CEOs who act as philanthropists are simply following his counsel.

Philanthropy, of course, is far less interesting than a good old-fashioned murder. While Machiavelli admired Borgia, he also recognized his weaknesses. Here, Machiavelli is brutally honest. He identifies some unpalatable truths about human nature and gives them to us straight. If we refuse to acknowledge these truths, we become easy prey for the first Cesare Borgia to happen our way. Powerful people do not always play nice.

These days, of course, our leaders are far less bloodthirsty than Borgia. If you cross your manager, he probably won't have you drowned in the Tiber. Backstabbing is not what it used to be; usually there's no funeral involved.

Even so, misjudging your relationship with powerful people can jeopardize your career, your health and your bank balance. Open any newspaper and you will find the stories of those who abused their power and those who became their victims.

Power is most often abused when both the perpetrator and the victim share dysfunctional beliefs about power. Both act out of fear. The perpetrator fears losing power, or being exposed as a fraud. The victim fears humiliation and ridicule. In the end, both reap what they fear most.

The sad fact is very few people know how to lead. This was as true during the Renaissance as it is today. Leaders channel the energies of their people toward a common goal. They temper their self-interest. They build networks, rather than fortresses. Most people lack these skills. Instead, they cajole, criticize or threaten. This is not leadership; this is bullying. It is the only strategy they know.

Bullies are essentially weak. The best defense against a bully is not to cringe, nor to fight back. The best defense against a bully is no defense at all. Bullies are not attracted to people who are strong, calm and self-confident.

We may be tested, however. Any decent bully knows how to press our buttons. We all have self-doubts, and bullies can sense these instinctively. If we cower, we become victims. If we fight back aggressively, we become bullies. Neither stance will bring us happiness. Once we begin bullying others, we must always watch our backs. The vast majority of Roman Emperors cited in The Prince died violently, before their time. Every time we bully someone, we create an enemy.

How we respond to those more powerful than us shapes our treatment of those who are weaker. We will all be given the opportunity to lead others. It might be at work, in politics, in our community, or even within our family. Families can be the most dangerous of all--Cesare Borgia is said to have murdered his brother. Those whom we know intimately are best attuned to our frailties.

When we become leaders, we will be challenged. If we have any self-doubts, they will become obvious to others. We all have strengths and weaknesses. If we try to hide our weaknesses, they will be exposed.

The key to effective leadership is self-knowledge and self-acceptance. This is not what most people imagine when they think of Machiavelli. But men like Borgia were destroyed precisely because they lacked self-knowledge. Had Borgia recognized his weaknesses, he would have taken a different path. But only strong people can acknowledge their weaknesses.

Self-acceptance is equally important. Once we accept our imperfections, they lose their power and others cannot use them to manipulate us. We find the courage needed to speak the truth to power. And we find it easier to accept the imperfections in others. Whether we lead or follow, self-knowledge and self-acceptance are indispensable.

Machiavelli teaches us to take responsibility for our relationship with power. This is not obligatory, of course, but merely wise. Understanding Machiavelli gives us a richer appreciation for human nature. It allows us to foresee problems, defuse dangerous situations and make wiser decisions.

To learn the inner workings of power, read The Prince. Observe others with unfailing honesty. Look within yourself. Identify and acknowledge your weaknesses. Cultivate your inner strengths. Then, when the Cesare Borgia in your life invites you to dinner, you will be able to respond with clarity and confidence.

Maslow's Heirarchy of Needs

Deficiency needs must be met first. Once these are met, seeking to satisfy growth needs drives personal growth. Once an individual has moved upwards to the next level, needs in the lower level will no longer be prioritized. If a lower set of needs is no longer being met, the individual will temporarily re-prioritize those needs by focusing attention on the unfulfilled needs, but will not permanently regress to the lower level.

The first four layers of the pyramid are what Maslow called "deficiency needs" or "D-needs": if they are not met, the body gives no indication of it physically, but the individual feels anxious and tense. The deficiency needs are: survival needs, safety and security, love and belonging, and esteem.

"A man with a toothache cannot be in love".

Physiologic Needs --> Safety needs --> Love/Social Needs --> Self-Esteem Needs --> Self Actualization

With their physical needs relatively satisfied, the individual's safety needs take over and dominate their behavior. These needs have to do with people's yearning for a predictable, orderly world in which injustice and inconsistency are under control, the familiar frequent and the unfamiliar rare. In the world of work, these safety needs manifest themselves in such things as a preference for job security, grievance procedures for protecting the individual from unilateral authority, savings accounts, insurance policies, and the like.

For the most part, physiological and safety needs are reasonably well satisfied in the "First World". The obvious exceptions, of course, are people outside the mainstream — the poor and the disadvantaged. If frustration has not led to apathy and weakness, such people still struggle to satisfy the basic physiological and safety needs. They are primarily concerned with survival: obtaining adequate food, clothing, shelter, and seeking justice from the dominant societal groups.

Safety and Security needs include:

• Personal security from crime
• Financial security
• Health and well-being
• Safety net against accidents/illness and the adverse impacts

Social needs

After physiological and safety needs are fulfilled, the third layer of human needs is social. This psychological aspect of Maslow's hierarchy involves emotionally-based relationships in general, such as:

• friendship
• intimacy
• having a supportive and communicative family

Humans need to feel a sense of belonging and acceptance, whether it comes from a large social group, such as clubs, office culture, religious groups, professional organizations, sports teams, gangs ("Safety in numbers"), or small social connections (family members, intimate partners, mentors, close colleagues, confidants). They need to love and be loved (sexually and non-sexually) by others. In the absence of these elements, many people become susceptible to loneliness, social anxiety, and Clinical depression. This need for belonging can often overcome the physiological and security needs, depending on the strength of the peer pressure; an anorexic, for example, ignores the need to eat and the security of health for a feeling of control and belonging.

Esteem needs

All humans have a need to be respected, to have self-esteem, self-respect, and to respect others. People need to engage themselves to gain recognition and have an activity or activities that give the person a sense of contribution, to feel accepted and self-valued, be it in a profession or hobby. Imbalances at this level can result in low self-esteem or inferiority complexes. People with low self-esteem need respect from others. They may seek fame or glory, which again depends on others. It may be noted, however, that many people with low self-esteem will not be able to improve their view of themselves simply by receiving fame, respect, and glory externally, but must first accept themselves internally. Psychological imbalances such as depression can also prevent one from obtaining self-esteem on both levels.

Growth needs

Though the deficiency needs may be seen as "basic", and can be met and neutralized (i.e. they stop being motivators in one's life), self-actualization and transcendence are "being" or "growth" needs (also termed "B-needs"); i.e. they are enduring motivations or drivers of behavior.

Aesthetic needs

Based on Maslow's beliefs, it is stated in the hierarchy humans need beautiful imagery or something new and aesthetically pleasing to continue towards Self-Actualization. Humans need to refresh themselves in the presence and beauty of nature while carefully absorbing and observing their surroundings to extract the beauty the world has to offer.

Principles of Happiness

Love & Caring
Service Give Kindness Charity
Patience
Energy & Hope & Faith
Listen Relationships
Learning Education Teaching

The Good

Alison Ryann Jed Luke Campbell Dave
humankind
service
thrift and safe returns
good vision

To create is a worthy endeavor

Organizational Behavior Theories